Today I want to blog about friendships.

When we left Indiana we left behind (though only physically) the best group of mama-friends I’ve ever known. I was privileged to be and move among them for several years.

Within that group there were those mamas I knew only online, others I knew from IRL interactions, though not well. And then there were the ones who came to my house for our homeschooling co-op for the several months that we hosted it there.

And then there were my closest friends. These are the mama-goddess-friends that are so on my mind today.

The two mama-friends that most touched my soul are Anna and Pam.

With Anna I feel a spiritual connection unlike any other. Almost from the first time she came over to our house for a playdate, I felt that we had known each other for a very long time. Often we seem to be on parallel spiritual paths, which is good and appropriate, as it helps us to touch base with one another through all life’s travels.

I miss taking our baby girls (and leaving the older children with their respective papas) and having a girls-night. It usually involved Indian food and a trip to someplace that got the creative juices flowing.

With Pam, I felt a full-family connection. All our children line up well, with each boy having a near-age companion and with our daughters being only 3 months apart.

Pam and James and their beautiful children are absolutely my favorite family. I adore them totally and completely and wish that we could see them often. Seriously, if we found a multi-family home to live in with them, we could be our own intentional community, what with our 6 (soon to be 7, more on that later) children.

You know SouleMama? Pam is my personal SouleMama. While I know that she is human and has all the foibles and faults as the rest of us (um, at least I’m assuming so 😉 she seems more serene and competent and talented than the rest of us.

Seriously, Pam, I look up to you as a model of what I hope I can be someday for my children. Your serenity and your spirit, your constant smile and countenance bring me joy and happiness.

Pam and I met whilst we were each pregnant with our daughters. It was at an AP-mamas gathering. There were 2 little boys that I didn’t know and my boys were itching to play with ‘not babies.’ And we all hit it off immediately.

So during the months of my 3rd trimester and babymooning, and then Pam’s 3rd trimester and babymooning, we met for frequent play. Usually at our house, since we had the space and a huge backyard.

After the homebirth of each of our daughters, we met often in the backyard of our little home and sat on a blanket and nursed our babies and watched the collective 4 big-brothers play.

Later, after I met Anna, she joined our mama-collective, sitting on the blanket, resting with her increasingly large baby-belly, while the now 6 children played.

After Ruby was born, we would all sit and nurse the babies; Pam with Izzy, Mary with Whingari, Anna with Ruby.

There was a rhythm to our weeks. Each Friday there would be communally shared and prepared good food. There would be wild, monkey play. There would, invariably, be nude, happy children running free. There would be nursing. There would be misunderstandings between this child or that and another. There would be gentle ‘pushes’ towards playing in ways that were good and respectful.

There would be a celebration of life and women. We are absolutely at our best when we are well-loved by a partner, nurturing our children AND held in the hearts of good, good mama-friends.

Life does not get better than that.

And now, comes the fantastic good news that awesome-mama-goddess Pam is expecting blessing number 4. It is with absolutely, heart-exploding joy that I greet this news. I am so happy for this beautiful family. I am so happy for this beautiful woman.

These are the beautiful people who are living in our home in Indiana. This is the beautiful woman who may decide to homebirth in the same room where Whingari was born.

The only bittersweet aspect to my joy is that I will have to partake in it all from afar.

Our lives are here now. Yet a good part of my heart lives in Indiana with Pam and Anna and their beautiful families and resplendant spirits.

through the tears,
Mary

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