Papa Chris is off on his weekday sojourn into the city. He’s a good man who doesn’t much mind having to commute to work. At the apartment he could walk to work…it was a long walk, but he did it when weather allowed. At the house in Indiana, again weather-allowing, he rode his bike. Both of those options are now so close to improbable they might as well be impossible.
Chris drives 45 minutes away, parks the van and hops on a commuter train. He’s on the train for about an hour, which he reports is the best part of the commute. The train is quiet and smooth. Once this train arrives at his destination, he gets off, crosses a small divide and boards a metro train. This brings him almost to his office, and he walks the rest of the way.
A good 2 hours after leaving the house, he arrives, sometimes wet, for work.
He’s a good man. He’s made these sacrifices so that his family can be in this place of peace and beauty. Sometimes I wonder if we made the right decision. But it is the decision we made and it is a decision that we continue to think worthwhile.
Again, the house is quiet. I hear a clock ticking. I hear the furnace hurumphing to life now and then. I hear the steady rhythm of Theo’s breathing.
I try to get out of bed before Chris leaves. Just a few minutes with him is worth less sleep. Then, upon his departure, I sit down with the laptop and check in.
I feel more connected to life beyond these walls if I read email, check my to do list, read blog posts delivered by google reader, glance at facebook, etc.
Some mornings I have this time all to myself. Other mornings Whingari finds me, climbs onto my lap, and falls back asleep. This morning, however, finds me with Theo in my lap, asleep.
Theo is such a joy to mother. He is sweet and expressive and responsive. He makes me laugh all the time with the things he says. We call them ‘Theo-isms’ and they are priceless. (Just one example: Recently Theo picked up a book of Aesop’s Fables. Not knowing who to pronounce that, he came up with ‘Assfop.’ And I discovered how difficult it is to drive safely when laughing so hard one cries. 😀 )
I love all the attachlings, deeply and unconditionally. But there are different phases of easy and less easy in childhood. Nic has always been a turbulent child. He’s brilliant and imaginative, but rarely ‘easy.’ And Whingari is two — fully two. She can be sweetness and light one moment and then, quixotically, surly and hostile the next.
Theo still lives in a limbo between babyhood and critical thought. He’s 5 and has the dearest, biggest heart of any human I know. And he’s still *just* small enough to snuggle up with in the mornings.
So, now, gentle readers, I come to the end of this meandering, peaceful post.
blessings to you,
PS — Theo also has a fantastic laugh…you can *almost* hear it, can’t you?