From a conversation this morning:

Our life here is crazy and chaotic and messy and (frequently) loud and always more tumultuous than I’d like. But wishing it away hasn’t worked. Wanting to be someone else didn’t work. So I’m doing the very buddhist thing of really feeling what I feel, living the days before me more, not numbing to the reality of it, not overreacting to change things…just endeavoring to see what is really happening, right before me, at any given minute. That is the fodder from which I build the next moment, and the next one after that. That keeps me in the now.

Funny thing I’ve discovered staying in the now — that’s where my children are every time I panic because I can’t seem to find them anywhere else. 😉

Which reminds me to post a link to this video:

Raise Your Glass by Pink

This life doesn’t look anything like I thought it would.
By *this life* I mean one that is authentic and satisfying.

I have long carried a (mistaken) belief that if I copied another family’s “look” (ie what I could see/observe from the outside) that I could have the type of life I wanted for us.

Now I see that this crazy, chaotic, loud jumble IS our bliss.